The kids and I have been out of town for 9 days. We came home tonight, and it feels good to be back in our home with Rick. Before I left town, I told a friend of mine that I really don't like going on vacation without Rick. When we lived in Buffalo and now that we live in NYC, it is common for moms to leave town with the kids while the dads stay home and work. We live far away from grandparents in the west, so I understand why so many families do this during the summer. I don't have the luxury to take off for a long period of time, because I also have a job. I am impressed with the moms who do make these long summer trips happen, because I get to a point when it is really tough for me to be gone without my husband. As I explained this to my friend, she was quick to realize that Rick must be a big help to me. He really is. I am so glad to be back home with him.
Rick is a wonderful husband and father. He likes to play with the kids, and he likes to challenge them to try new things. He is the one who taught Caleb how to spell his name, and he taught Natalie how to give high fives. While we were gone, he cleaned our apartment. I hate to admit this, but it was probably the cleanest it has ever been since we have lived here. It looked awesome. There are many times when I think, I am so lucky to be married to him.
Rick is generally a positive guy. He has not cried since he was 12 (or maybe younger). So you guessed it, I have never seen him cry. I am the opposite in the emotional department. I've been known to cry at small things, like if our kids start acting up. Since Rick shows emotion differently than me, it is tough to know if something really bothers him.
Tonight when Rick picked us up from the airport, he told me that he had some bad news. Rick only shares bad news if it really is bad, so I knew this was serious. He told me that his friend from high school, Mike McCullough, had passed away in a scuba diving accident. Wow. We talked about it for a little while, but I think I was mostly in shock. I had known Mike while Rick and I were dating. He came to our wedding, and we would run into him every other Christmas in WA. I didn't really know what Rick thought about all of this.
We came home. He watched Natalie wobble around the room and rediscover the toys she hadn't seen in 9 days. He helped Caleb get ready for bed by reading him a story and brushing his teeth. And then, when the kids were mostly in bed...I mean mostly because their time schedules were so off that they were not falling asleep. Rick checked out some facebook posts and some blog posts about Mike. He tried calling Mike's parents. We laid in bed talking about what had happened. That's when I realized that most of the night his mind was back in high school remembering Mike. I think Mike's death has affected him more than any other death he has known. Maybe it is because Mike was so young with a young family. Maybe it is because Rick wished he had been in better touch with his old friends. But, I think mostly it is because Rick had a relationship with Mike at a crucial point in his life. Adolescence is a crucial time, and I think Mike helped shape Rick into the person he is today.
We will miss you Mike, and we pray for your family. We are so grateful for the gospel and the knowledge that life goes on after we die.
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